Mom covered almost everything with you; do unto others…take your vitamins…wash your hands and many more gems of wisdom. I have the opportunity to work with many talented people in business and have noticed some common struggles seem to be stumbling blocks to success for people in the workplace. If mom didn’t cover this or maybe it got lost along the way, here is the first stumbling block: Productively receiving negative feedback or criticism.
Receiving criticism well is an important skill that can help you improve on your weaknesses and emphasize your strengths
Let’s face it, nobody relishes in hearing people tell them things that could be perceived as weaknesses. Who wants to hear about what’s not going so well? With a few simple techniques, you can turn this information into something productive and helpful for your own growth and improvement:
1. Don’t react, respond
When someone brings up a criticism, our natural reaction is to be defensive. We feel threatened and may try to explain or justify what’s going on. When we feel threatened, we tend to think with a different part of our brain (the primal) part. This part of our brain rules by being very reactionary. Think of the “fight or flight” response. So most people will either retreat or go into attack mode.
Try to resist this natural reaction and instead slow down. Take a deep breath and listen. Perhaps a question would be helpful: “Tell me more about why you think that?” You don’t need to agree with the person to hear them out. You could empathize with them by pointing out how they are feeling. “I see this situation is upsetting for you”.
You normally don’t owe them answer right away. Would it be more beneficial to take some time and consider what they have shared? Most importantly, would it make sense to actually thank them for coming to you with a concern? Sometimes a simple, “thank you for bringing that to my attention, I will certainly reflect on what you have said”, is the ideal response in these situations.
2. Recognize that nobody’s perfect
Secondly, if you believe this criticism has shattered a perfect track record, you likely need a reality check. We all have areas where we can improve. Some of them we are well-aware of, but others are legitimate blind spots. If someone shared something with you that seems to hit a blind spot, you have the most to gain from realistically considering what was said.
The most successful leaders who excel in their careers are always in a state of self-development. They consider what can be done to improve and make active plans to do so. If someone just shared with you something to work on, they have given you a gift. One you can make the most of or brush aside, potentially to come back to haunt you at some point in the future. If they told you, how many other people perceive the same thing, yet decided not to address it with you?
3. Seek to understand
When you take a few moments to consider the feedback that was shared with you, try to see it from someone else’s perspective. We often get so wrapped up in our plans, needs and agenda that we fail to consider the point-of-view others may have. Once you can relate to another’s outlook, you are in a better place to understand where their comments are coming from. From there you are in an even better position to address it (assuming it is something that needs to be addressed).
4. Find the truth
If after considering the feedback, you are still struggling with what to make of it, remember a favorite term of marketers: “Perception Equals Reality”. Sure, what people perceive may be their reality. However, it is not always equal to what is the truth, or intended. Ultimately, what is the reason why someone holds a particular perception? You may have to dig more deeply beyond what was said to understand the truth or recognize that your intent was misunderstood based on the perception that was shared with you.
If you can see the criticism as an opportunity to more deeply understand and improve, it will be a productive exchange. You may even come out of it as a stronger leader with an improved working relationship.
If you were given the choice to attend a presentation with a salesperson OR organize your office – which one would you choose? Can you stand to hear one more presentation?
Can you think of the last time you were excited for a meeting where someone was going to try and sell you something? Our customers are not excited either! I’m starting to think that we should eliminate the words sell and presentational together.
Words are very powerful whether we speak them or think them. There is a lot of knowledge to support this:
A man is but the product of his thoughts, what he thinks he becomes. – Mahatma Ghandi
Words are also actions, and actions are a kind of words. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it. – Proverbs 18:21
With so much power in the words we use to affect our actions & outcomes, doesn’t it make sense to be more intentional about what we say we are going to do? What if instead of a salesperson preparing a SALES PRESENTATION, they changed the quality of the customer meeting (and likely the outcome) if they purposefully prepare for having a STRATEGIC CONVERSATION with recommendations based on the customer’s needs? What if instead of focusing on driving SALES, leaders focused their sales teams on driving PARTNERSHIP experiences / opportunities with customers?
What would you rather do: hear to a sales presentation / proposal, or have a strategic, needs-based conversation with a partner that talks about what makes sense for your business? A Chinese proverb says, “If you wish to know the mind of a man, listen to his words.” What do your customers know about the minds of the salespeople that work with them from your organization? Are they of the mind to become strategic partners, or to simply sell them something?
What three projects, tasks or priorities will most contribute to the accomplishment of your biggest and most important goal?
Write them on a notecard, and then spend 90 percent of your day on those tasks. Spend the other 10 percent delegating,
Productivity is not an accident. It’s a decision.
Legendary coach John Wooden said, “Don’t mistake activity for achievement.” You may be busy from the moment your alarm goes off in the morning until the time your head hits the pillow at night, but are you accomplishing anything meaningful toward the fulfillment of your goals? Are you making forward progress, or are you just running in place?
Make a decision today to stop wasting time—or just spending time—and, instead, invest some time in learning how you can be more productive in the areas of your life that really matter.
The SUCCESS Magazine team has put together tips and strategies from experts and readers alike for enhancing your productivity at the office, at home and on the go.
1. Plan Your Day
While many people rely on their computer’s calendar, writing down events and to-do lists in a day planner or journal forces you to spend a few minutes each day setting short-term goals and prioritizing tasks. Reader Simon Ponce uses the 90-Day Success Planner. Of course, the Franklin Covey planner is a beloved classic. And other readers have discovered The 7-Minute Life Daily Planner by Allyson Lewis, who suggests the strategy of a “5 before 11™” list—the five things you want to accomplish before 11 a.m.
2. List Your Goals
Hopes and dreams remain fantasies until you identify them, write them down and create a plan for achieving them.
3. Determine Your Best Time of Day
Are you a night owl? An early riser? You may already know your peak times of day for energy and creativity. If not, take a week and chart the times of day when your energy and attention seem to peak or lag. When do you work quickly or creatively? When do you make the most errors? Once you know your peak times, schedule activities accordingly, keeping in mind that everyone has highs and lows throughout the day; it’s what you do with them that counts.
4. Journal
Not only a diary, a journal is an all-encompassing log of thoughts, ideas, discussions, phone numbers, tasks, planning, reminders, etc. By keeping a journal, you’ll have only one place to look for previous ideas, thoughts and plans. As SUCCESS reader Jim McMonagle says, “My journal is my productivity tool. It keeps me focused on what is most important every day.”
5. Commit to a Peak-Performance Partner
Once a week, have a 30-minute accountability call with another super-achieving peer. Discuss your wins, losses, fixes and ah-has, and challenge each other for better results the following week.
6. Rethink and Renew
Historian Arnold Toynbee said, “Nothing fails like success.” Using old strategies to tackle new circumstances may be keeping you from taking greater strides. In his blog, Stephen R. Covey recommends taking time to rethink. “We have to examine our paradigms (our view of things), our tools, our skills to determine if we’re approaching the problem in the right way. As a first step, we may even step back and make sure we’ve correctly defined the problem. Then we need to see if, based on the evidence of results or lack of results, we need a new approach.” If you find you need some new tools or skills, don’t be discouraged. “This can be an exciting proposition because you will most likely find new growth and development in the process—this is success!”
7. Narrow Your Focus
What three projects, tasks or priorities will most contribute to the accomplishment of your biggest and most important goal? Write them on a notecard, and then spend 90 percent of your day on those tasks. Spend the other 10 percent delegating, reassigning or in rapid response.
8. Invest in a Smart Phone
While your Web-enabled, application-happy smart phone can be a distraction, it is also a valuable productivity tool, aiding in last-minute research, emergency file downloads, calendar management, social networking or grocery lists. Explore your phone’s capabilities and see what it has to offer.
9. Get Real with Your To-Do List
“I make a to-do list by the week,” says SUCCESS reader Eva Pauline Scott. “Then I can see everything at a glance and pick what I need to do at the time that will fit the day. Also, I like David Allen’s Getting Things Done idea that If it will take less than two minutes (in my case 10), do it now.”
10. Take Personal Responsibility
You are the only one responsible for handling your time and productivity, says Laura Stack, author of Super Competent: The Six Keys to Perform at Your Productive Best. “Never lay the blame on anyone else,” she writes. “Unless you live in a totalitarian state or are an indentured servant (unlikely), then, when it comes to productivity, it’s all up to you. If something or someone gets in your way, it’s your duty to go around.”
11. Outsource
Calculate how much your time is worth and spend it doing what you do best. Then hire others to clean the house, pick up the dry cleaning, complete mail-outs or answer routine e-mails. “I don’t do it all myself. Delegation to well-trained and talented staff is the key,” says SUCCESS reader Shelly Larson Lisoskie.
12. Remember Your Why
Whether it’s your toddler at home, your spouse on the beach or a group of lifelong friends that’s more like family, remind yourself what you’re working for: time with the people you love most. As SUCCESS reader Joan Graham says, “I stay focused. I have photos of my family at my desk, which motivate me and keep me centered.
As trust within an organization increases, so does output, morale, productivity and loyalty; meanwhile cost, problems, stress and skepticism decrease. For the trusted brand, customers will return again and again and tell others. Do you agree?
Think about it? How much does trust influence your buying decisions?
For me, as the price and importance of the purchase goes up… so does my need to trust the company that I am buying from.
The last car that I bought was a 2010 Buick Lacrosse. I work closely with the Bill Marsh Automotive Group in Traverse City, and it was because I totally trust everything that they stand for that I made this purchase. In fact, I trust them so much I bought this car without even test driving it. Because I am in Detroit, I talked to my sales adviser on the phone and we worked out the whole deal in a matter of a couple of days. I mailed them a check and they shipped the car to my house. Now that’s trust! I love my car and I will buy my next car the exact same way.
How do we define trust? According to David Horsager, in his new book “The Trust Edge,” the eight pillars for building and rebuilding trust are:
Clarity: People trust what is clear, not ambiguous.
Compassion: It’s one reason everyone loves Mom; she cares about others. Keep eye contact, empathize and hold one conversation at a time for effective listening.
Character: Do what’s right, not easy. Think George Washington…
Competency: Example … you don’t want just anyone to do your root canal. You want someone who will do it well.
Contribution: People trust your contribution, your results. Someone full of compassion and character who doesn’t bring results will suffer in the trust department. Ditto for the sales guy who brings results but in a sleazy way.
Commitment: The only way to build trust is to make and keep a commitment.
Connection: People like to buy from and be around friends.
Consistency: It’s why we trust McDonald’s. We get the same burger in Detroit and Atlanta.
Chime in below with your thoughts. What are some companies that have done an exceptional job of building trust with you? Some people? In what ways did they go about building this trust?
With the holidays around the corner you will likely be exposed to some events, parties or networking opportunities in the coming weeks. Make the most of them with these tips for starting or engaging in a conversation. Whether you need material for engaging your boss socially, connecting with a client or conversing with e co-worker, here are 6 tips to keep you going through the end of the year and beyond:
If you want to be interesting in conversation, be an interesting person. Stay informed on current events. Even listening to news-radio in your car for a few minutes on your commute can get you up to speed. Get involved in activities that excite you, as people appreciate others who have passion for what they do or are involved in.
A little preparation will go a long way in enabling you to easily converse with others. Keep a mental list of good topics of discussion and ways to break the ice you can use when you need to.
Most people like to talk about themselves and will respond positively when asked simple, friendly questions. Don’t be afraid to ask questions then make an effort to be a good listener. After you make the initial effort, listen closely to the other person’s response. Use questions to draw out more information from them on a topic that is of interest to them. Often you’ll find an invitation to continue the conversation if you listen carefully and respond accordingly.
Try to remember small details about co-workers and acquaintances. Asking a follow up question about a weekend plan or a relative is an excellent way to start a conversation and show genuine interest in those around you.
Learning how to start a conversation is really just using good manners and showing a genuine interest in others. Balance is the key in any conversation. Alternate between talking and listening to what the other person is saying and make additional comments as appropriate.
Developing self-confidence is an important part of learning how to start a conversation. Even if you find it extremely difficult, always greet those you encounter with a smile and look them directly in the eye. It may be hard at first, but self-confidence is a learned skill and by acting confidently, you will gain new self-confidence. Soon enough you will notice that it is not as hard to maintain eye contact and carry on a conversation. Act confidently and you will eventually become confident.
At a recent conference workshop for business leaders hosted by Aha! Leadership: Connecting & Engaging with an Audience & the Customer– Techniques of the Masters, we covered the top 10 ways to fascinate, captivate & influence based on the books, seminars, blogs and communication from the most successful communicators, leaders & salespeople of all time. The workshop focused on effectively communicating with customers and potential customers by focusing on connecting with & engaging them versus interaction that focuses on selling.
Business leaders are most often focused on results: sales volume, revenue, & margin, so it is easy to expect the sales team to be most focused on this as well. The problem with making results the top priority, is that can overlook the most important variable in the sales equation – what the customer needs and why they buy.
The goal of the workshop was for each participant to choose 3 techniques they could adopt to immediately communicate more effectively by connecting with & engaging their customers, teams, partners & investors. We want to share one of the most game-changing techniques based on the feedback from the leaders in the workshop.
TECHNIQUE: MAKE NUMBERS MEANINGFUL
Numbers, metrics and statistics can be very powerful when building a case for what you are trying to communicate. The first thing is to be sure they are impressive numbers that tell a compelling story. If what you are trying to show is remarkable, exciting or inspiring – then it is essential that you help people understand them in real terms. Provide an analogy that makes the point & tells the story all on its own. One of the best examples of this technique is from a great book Presentation Secrets of Steven Jobs: How to be Insanely Great in Front of Any Audience by Carmine Gallo. When introducing the iPod, Apple needed to convey how extraordinary the iPod’s memory capabilities were at a time when many consumers were not yet familiar with what measurements like megabytes and gigabytes really meant. So instead of telling people that it had “12 gigabytes of memory”, because they knew most people wouldn’t really understand the significance of it – what Steven Jobs said instead was, “it has enough space to listen to new music to the moon and back.” WOW! That’s a lot of memory, and when put into those terms everyone from 5 to 95 years old understands.
If you would like your sales team & other team members to learn more techniques about how to effectively connect with and engage customers and those they communicate with internally, we would love to help! Please contact us to find out how we can design a workshop especially for your team.
