Handling conflicts and drama at work can be really tough. Why? Because it involves emotions and feelings… two things most leaders don’t like to talk about much.
See if you can relate to a couple of common mistakes we tend to make when dealing with a emotional situations:
- Downplaying or attempting to brush off emotionally charged situations. Rationalizing that: “My day is too busy to deal with this emotional stuff.”
- Trying to ignore “it” or the people involved, hoping “it” will resolve itself or just go away.
How has this worked for you? Have you found that doing this can actually make it worse and waste more time?
What’s the answer? Strengthen your emotional intelligence.
Emotional intelligence (EI) is a measure of ones “ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups.”
Emotionally intelligent people are much more likely to succeed. Successful people, naturally, are the kind of people companies want to hire.
In fact, studies over the past decade pinpoint emotional intelligence as possibly the single most important factor contributing to success in the workplace. Very emotionally intelligent people are more likely to be stellar performers, regardless of the industry they’re in.
Try this easy three step process when handling emotional conflicts.
Step 1: Acknowledge it.
More than anything, people want to be heard and acknowledged. It may seem overly simple, but try saying:
“I want you to know…., or
I understand you are feeling very stressed right now…,”
These words can go miles when you are trying to lower the emotional stakes of a situation.
Step 2: Provide positive reinforcement.
Positive reinforcement is very powerful and will effectively reframe almost any negative situation when done respectfully.
Someone with a high EQ might say something like:
“I know you are under a lot of stress, and I know a great deal of it is because you are a great employee and want to do the very best job you can…”
Step 3: Stop and listen.
So many times the answer is so simple… just listen.
Many people just need to talk out the situation with someone they trust. So, be supportive, zip your lip and just sit back and listen.
If you want to test your EQ or Emotional Quotient you can visit this website: Emotional IQ Test